I'm Gonna Get Stuff Wrong

I’ve been terrified to start publishing things on this blog, because I want to write about sensitive topics that are important to me and lots of other people. I want to write about relationships, and consent, and ways to take care of ourselves and the people we love and the world in general. I want to write about new ways of looking at these things, and at the world.

And the thing is, I know I’m going to get some of this stuff wrong. I’m gonna say that right up front, because I already know it’s true.

The more I think and talk and write about this topic, the more I realize how much I’ve gotten wrong over the years. I look at the world, and I see things I once believed, and I see people getting raked over the coals over those things. And I’m terrified that this is going to happen to me.

I’m not at all sure that I should be doing this work. I pass as very privileged, and I am very privileged, and every person who’s reading something I write or hearing me speak is not spending that time reading or listening to someone more marginalized. Also, as I’ve mentioned, the things I write or talk about might be wrong. My putting things into the world might distract from someone smarter or better than me.

I look at both of these fears, and I realize that while there’s some validity there, there’s also some bullshit there. Some percentage of this is resistance to doing the work that is mine to do in this world. Giving in to that is wrong in its own way.

I think everybody gets a chance to go into the arena. I believe that there is something unique and valuable in the way I express ideas, and that my doing the work is worthwhile.

If you want someone who’s never going to get it wrong, who’s never going to screw up, or even accidentally hurt someone, then definitely go elsewhere. And I wish you the best of luck in finding that person.

And if you disagree that I should even be putting my voice out into the world, please do find someone who’s work is better for you to experience. There is so much great content in the world, I believe everyone has the opportunity to find something that really works for them.

If you want to engage me in conversation, to help me look at the world in a better way, I’m grateful for that. Because I want to learn and grow and keep finding new ways to look at the world. I’ll share my flawed journey as I go.

And if that is helpful to you, then I am grateful for the opportunity to be a part of that. So many people have helped me grow and learn, and have given m more patience and effort and grace than I could possibly deserve in a thousand lifetimes. My goal is to give some of that back into the world in my own way.